the worst blogger ever

Soooo.... This last hiatus lasted a year and a half.  I never could keep a diary, so I'm not making any promises on how long this current blogging stint is going to last.  I mean, for the four of you that used to care.  But, I'm back for now!

I left up a few of my old posts for giggles.  I read back through them fondly, until I realized how amateur my writing style was back then.  Gosh y'all, I have really grown as a writer in the last year.  Not from practicing or anything... but clearly my thought processes have matured.  

I'm totally kidding.  Please don't expect anything different.  

So, let's see here.  Quickie catch-up:  

• My kids are still awesome - but bigger, smarter, and far more menacing.  
• I fell crazy in love and am now engaged (woohooooo - party coming soon!)
• I left corporate America and got a tattoo.   
• People told me I was good at planning parties and taking pictures, so I figured I'd start a business. 
• I completely figured out how to live in the present. 
• I stopped drinking Diet Coke all the time, Crystal Light is my new crack.  

I mean, seriously.  You gotta admit that was a pretty big year.  There was no time for blogging.  Alas, things have calmed down and here I am.  

Honestly, I just wanted an excuse to buy my domain back.  So here we go... Again. :)


XO,
ab

  

valentine woes - part 2

Welp - we have the answer to Blake's anxiety about Valentine's Day.  He's in love.  Monica told me so. 

They were already loaded up in the car this morning and when I got in, it all unfolded.

Monica:  Guess what, Mommy?!?  Blake just said he has a girlfriend!  And she's in his class! 
Blake:  Giggles, hides face with hands.
Me: Buddy, is that true?  Clearly.  The kid can't stop laughing now.
Blake: Mon-i-caaaaaaa, why'd you say that? 
Me: That's awesome, Blake!  Is she pretty?  Is she smart?  Is she funny?
Blake:  Hysterical laughter with each question, but nodding yes through them all.
Me:  Does she know she's your girlfriend?
Blake: Yes, but she doesn't like me.  I'm not her boyfriend.
Me: Oh. 
Monica: That's because she's SIX!  An older WOMAN!
Me: Oh. 

That's all I had.  I'm not really sure how this part works.  So I tried (unsuccessfully) to guess some of the girls' names that I remember from his class on the way to school.  As we were approaching, he got nervous again. "Mommy, can you please stop talking about this now?" he whispered.  "Blake, no one can hear me while we're in the car," I whispered back.  Nonetheless, I dropped it.  God forbid one of the fifth-graders that opens the car door for them to get out at the curb hears the tail-end of our conversation. 

On the rest of my commute, it all started coming together.  About two weeks ago, Blake started caring what he wore to school.  I've been lucky to be able to dress him as long as I have, but now he's getting picky.  No collared shirts, nothing with "dinosaurs or bears or anything babyish" on it - he only wants skull and crossbone stuff.  Which is leading me to believe he's in love with an emo kindergartener, which is slightly disturbing.  But we're going to roll with it.  Surely it's just a phase.

Famous last words.

valentine woes

Check out these fantastic crayon hearts the kids and I made to add to their Valentine cards at school this year!  Aren't those super cute?  We really had a blast chopping up crayons and (not-so) patiently waiting on them to completely melt in the oven. 

Monica was thrilled and has some fantastic ideas about how to make her own cards instead of using store-bought character crap.  I would tell you what they are, but got lost in all the details.  I remember hearing things like 'special paper, buttons, beads, hot glue...' - it's going to be a pretty big project.  Blake... not so much. 

Me: Buddy, won't these be cool to give to all your friends in class for Valentine's Day?  We can give them a little notebook, maybe some candy...

Blake: No.

Me:  Wait, what?  But we just made all these hearts!

Blake:  Yeah, soooo - I don't really want to go to school on Valentimes Day.

Me:  Whyyyyyy?  All of your friends are going to be giving you cards and you'll give them one.  That's the way it works now, it's completely fair.  Monica, back me up here - isn't Valentine's Day fun?

Monica:  Oh yes.  And this year, the boys that give me the best cards are the ones I'm going to chase for the rest of the school year!  It's probably going to be Thomas, and Connor, and...

Me:  Okay, baby.  That's a whole 'nother problem entirely.  Blake, you will go to school on V-day and you're going to love it!  Tell you what, I'll pick up some superhero cards for you to give out so you don't have to do heart stuff, is that better?

Blake:  Ummm, I guess.  But I'm still not going. 


This continued for as long as I could stand it, and he still wasn't convinced.  I remember overthinking Valentine's as a youngster - Who's going to give me one?  Is mine good enough?  Please God, I'll use my best handwriting forever if I get the most!  In contrast, Blake's anxiety is really stemming from the fact that he doesn't know what to expect, it's not the real fear that we had growing up.  

Anyway... There really aren't any surprises here since we know he'll be coming home with exactly 26 Valentines.  But I hope he treasures each one of 'em... and that mine is the best. :)

the swagger-wagon is dying.

Seriously, this breaks my heart a little.  And then I remember it's a Pacifica and I'm okay again.

We do have some great (and sometimes slightly horrifying) memories though.  The time we hit the recliner... the big cement post... the neighbor.  Kid vomit, dog vomit, and an exploding can of Cherry Coke Zero.  The list goes on.  I can't even explain the alleged blood spatter stains on the driver side floorboard because we've been through so much.  So you see?  There's a lot of history here.

And then the check engine light came on last week and our friendship ended pretty abruptly.  This quickly escalated to pure hatred when the thing started idling at an uncomfortably low rate at stoplights and making sounds under the hood that remind me of dial-up days.  In fact, if you ever get to hear this noise you too will find yourself waiting for the old AOL voice saying "you've got mail".  But it doesn't do that.  I've listened closely.  Plus, that would be kinda weird.... and awesome.

So I guess the search is on.  I'd like to find something that doesn't cost as much as a small house, but I live in SC so that's narrowing the scope quite a bit.  Nah, I'm just kidding.  If it's shiny I'll probably like it.

Get well soon, swagger-wagon.